In all seriousness, Mi Goreng noodles are AWESOME!
They are like little strands of heavenly goodness, cooked in the sweat of a million unicorns, seasoned by the best seasoners with rare herbs and spices only found in the Himalayas on a Wednesday, but only when there is a full moon, and when Uranus is lined up with Jupiter and Pluto, at an exact 45.4567degree angle (otherwise it would just taste like camel shit and it wouldn't be Mi Goreng!)
Here are my top five other reasons as to why Mi Goreng makes the best midnight snack:
1. They are super easy to prepare, zap in the microwave for a couple of minutes and voila! Instant hot food for those cold lonely nights when your flatmate is snoring away in the room next to you!
2. Best Post-drome/Hangover food EVER! Even when you still feel as though your head is nailed to a block of wood and you're going to barf up your upper digestive tract, Mi Goreng is always there to comfort you!(suprisingly you won't barf it back up! It's a miracle food!)
3. Mi Goreng is non-judgemental, it doesn't give a flying fart in a vacuum cleaner as to what you're wearing, how you act or any of that shit that people get all angsty about these days. It loves you for who you truly are!
4. Mi Goreng is "unsuitable for vegetarians and vegans" because of the flavour enhancer 631(which is derived from meat) so you can tell your insomniac vego friends to go f*ck themselves!
5. It's full of anti-oxidants! (OK so I made that bit up...but who cares... it's so badass that even Chuck Norris flavoured noodles can't compare with Mi Goreng!)
And there you have it.... Mi Goreng is just plain made of f*cking AWESOME!
p.s. somebody ate all my chocolate! bastards!
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